Model : @Pop Pawinee
I don’t even know what to tell you, the words clutter in my mind and make me think and think but I don’t let anything come out. I am so tired of going around in my head and always telling the same story. I only have the nostalgia for what was and could not be. To know that our end is final and that we will lose ourselves in the course of life. We have both done wrong things on our side, me lying to you and myself about what I feel, settling for what you want to give me when I have always wanted more. And you giving something something that you don’t really feel.
It hurts me to see all the things that we will miss but the truth is that they are already lost. Hopefully I can recover from this and be able to look at you again and understand that I have had a great experience from here, that I have learned a lot about love, about friendship, about feelings. Hopefully I can thank you for the good and the bad too. for making me stronger. Because that’s what everyone says to me “be strong” those two words I’ve been listening to all my life and as I grow older I hear it more. “You have to be strong and look out for yourself” and I never listen. I know the theory but I never approve of the practice. I love you, I know that and maybe I love you more than I should, more than me. And this is wrong. I know.